Defusion on the Go: Helping Kids Handle Sticky Thoughts in Everyday Moments
- Michael R Kiel
- Mar 29
- 4 min read
Updated: Dec 2
Introduction
Have you ever had a thought that just wouldn’t leave you alone—like gum stuck to your shoe?
Kids experience this too, but instead of a catchy tune, it might be a worry, a fear, or self-doubt that loops endlessly.
In Finn and Delaney’s stories, they learn how sticky thoughts can be:
“Sometimes they’re like gum stuck to your paw!” — Finn
To handle these thoughts in real time, the characters use a gentle skill called defusion—a way to step back from thoughts rather than getting tangled in them. And the best part? Defusion is something kids can practice anytime, anywhere.
That’s why we call it: Defusion on the Go.
What is Defusion?
Defusion means noticing thoughts without getting stuck to them.
Instead of treating thoughts like absolute truths, kids learn to see them for what they are—just words passing through the mind.
Picture a child in meltdown mode:
“I can’t wear that shirt!”
“My tower broke—everything is ruined!”
“I can't do this!”
No amount of logic helps in those moments because the thought and the feeling have fused together. ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) calls this fusion—when a thought sticks so hard it feels like truth.
Defusion gently loosens that grip and helps kids find a little space to choose their next step.
3 Quick Strategies for Busy Parents
You don’t need long conversations or therapy-style sessions. Defusion works beautifully in small, playful moments woven into ordinary life.
Here are three ways to practice Defusion on the Go:
1️⃣ “Thank You, Mind!” — A Helpful Reset Anywhere
In one story, Finn gets frustrated because he keeps forgetting clues during a treasure hunt. Thoughts start spiraling:
“I'm so bad at this!”
Delaney teaches him to pause and say:
“Thank you, Mind! I already know this is hard—thanks for the reminder.”
This quick, playful phrase helps kids:
Notice the thought
Acknowledge it
Move forward without fighting it
Try This With Your Child: Say it in a silly voice the next time a tough thought shows up:
“Oh hello again, ‘This is too hard’ thought—thanks for stopping by!”
Instant defusion. And with continued practice, this strategy can sometimes bring instant relief.
2️⃣ The Cloud in the Sky Trick - For Big Worries
When Delaney worries about leading a treasure hunt, Finn reminds her of a trick she once showed him:
Imagine the thought as a cloud
Notice its shape, size, or color
Watch it drift across the sky
It’s simple, soothing, and effective.
Try This With Your Child:
“Let’s imagine that worry is a cloud. Is it fluffy? Stormy? Small? Let’s watch it float away together.”
Perfect for practicing during car rides and later for difficult bedtimes or in waiting rooms.
3️⃣ Naming the Thought Defusion Strategy for Kids
When Finn thinks:
“I’ll never figure this out!”
Delaney helps by naming it:
“Ah, that’s your ‘I’ll never get it’ thought again.”
This takes the thought from truth to just a thought. Kids begin to gain distance and perspective, especially when practiced several times before putting it into real-world use.
Try This With Your Child when they say:
“I can’t do this.”
“Everyone hates me.”
“I’m terrible at this.”
You might say:
“Oh, that’s the ‘I can’t do it’ thought again. It sure likes to show up!”
Naming the thought puts your child back in the driver’s seat.
Defusion isn't just a skill - it's a way to turn sticky, frustrating thoughts into manageable ones, whether during a treasure hunt or a tough day driving in traffic.
Making Defusion Fun: Try the "Thank You, Mind" Activity
To help kids practice defusion in a hands-on way, we created a free printable worksheet inspired by Finn’s bubble-gum metaphor.
Kids will:
✔ Spot a sticky thought
✔ Thank their mind for sharing it
✔ Let it go by imagining it floating, drifting, or popping away
It’s a playful, research-supported way to help kids build emotional flexibility.
👉 Download the free worksheet here!
Then return to the Free Resources menu to explore other tools like this one.
Conclusion
Sticky thoughts are part of being human.
But with small, playful defusion moments, kids learn they don’t have to believe everything their mind tells them.
Try one of these on-the-go strategies the next time your child gets stuck—and don’t forget to use the free worksheet to make the skill even more engaging.
📌 Want a deeper dive into defusion? A complete research-backed blog post is available here.
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"You are not your thoughts. You are the awareness behind them."
- Eckhart Tolle
Disclaimer: The content of this blog is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to replace professional therapy, counseling, or medical advice. Always consult a qualified professional for personalized guidance regarding your or your child’s needs.
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